Do you feel like you’re working harder and longer on the job, only to maintain the same lifestyle? Worse yet, are you becoming tired and disillusioned with the results of your job, and maybe even your life? Do you find yourself wishing your circumstances would change? You could simply be in a “rut”. You’re not alone—almost everyone finds himself in a “rut” now and then.

The Oxford Dictionary defines a “rut” as “an established mode of practice or procedure” It defines “to be in a rut” as “following a fixed pattern of behavior that is difficult to change”

Success mentor and speaker Jim Rohn tells about when he was a young adult. He was in debt up to his eyeballs and behind on the promises he’d made to his wife and family. He confessed to a wise older friend how he wished his life would change. His wise friend told him. “If you want things to change, first YOU must change. That was the turning point of young Jim Rohn’s life. He went on to become a multi-millionaire and a respected, world-renowned motivational speaker.

The first time I heard Rohn speak his message it was as if he had hit me in the head with a 2×4: “Work hard at your job and you’ll make yourself a livin’…work hard on yourself and you’ll make yourself a fortune”. His voice, years later, rings in my ears, and I have quoted his words many times. Twenty words that changed my life. 

If you’re stuck in a “rut”, it’s time to stop wishing things would change and it’s time to start working on yourself. Changing yourself; taking responsibility for your life.

Here’s how you can do it:

#1) Become a student. What is the outcome you desire? Ask yourself what you need to learn between now and your desired outcome in order to actually achieve it? Do you need to learn how to have more discipline?  To learn how to be more content? Do you need to learn another language? A specific skill? Now is the time to enroll in the class, read the book, hire the coach, or sign up for that seminar. Become a student again….open your mind and heart to whatever you need to learn, to take that next step. Develop a passion for learning. Remember when you were a child, how much fun it was to learn and discover new things? Why should now be any different?

#2) Take charge of your “little time”. Now that you’ve determined what next step you need to take, the challenge is: fitting it in to what already feels like an impossible schedule. Let me help you: What are you doing with your “little time”?  Maybe, just maybe, you could go without that one television show or magazine a week in favor of a learning DVD, or forego that weekly lunch with the crew from the office in favor of a quiet hour of book reading. Maybe some time spent fooling around on the computer could be spent more constructively…if we want something, we have to be willing to give something up to get it…usually that “something” is time.

#3) Create a support team. Congratulations for being honest with yourself so far. Now comes a tough one: Think about your environment. Who is in the picture at home, at work, and at play? Are they cheering you on, or are they holding you back? Recently I heard a speaker boldly suggest that your our income is probably the average of the five people we spend the most time with. Am I suggesting you give up lifelong relationships? No…I am saying you need at least five or six people who can hold a high standard of performance for you and cheer you on to accomplish your goals. A support team is critical. Without one you will fall prey to the disease of complacency, or worse ye, the “why try—it’s not worth it” attitude, ending up in a worse “rut” than you’re already in, spinning your wheels. Identify your support team, and share your dreams and goals with them. Ask them to hold you accountable to some actions needed to make your dreams become a reality.

#4) Do things that create more physical and emotional health. Examine your daily activities: are they life-enhancing, or are they life-diminishing? Are you improving your health daily, or…are you slowly letting it slip away? Our thoughts, emotions, and brain send messages to our immune, nervous, and endocrine systems and to all the organs of our bodies. What are the thoughts that could be affecting your health? And what are you doing with your body that may be affecting your emotions? You see, your body and your mind are really not two separate things…they are one. Make choices that build a stronger body and better emotional balance.

#5) Where ever you are, be there. On a scale of one to ten, how is your ability to be “present” to a situation? When you are at work, are you 100% at work, or are you thinking of all the places you’d rather be? When you are with your family on vacation, are you 100% there, or are you thinking of all the things you have to do at work? Either way, everyone gets cheated, including yourself. Practice mindfulness and intentionality: what are you supposed to be doing right now? Focus on that one thing until it is accomplished, or until it is time to do something else. This won’t be easy at first; it takes lots of practice. Keep trying…it does get easier. Things like yoga or quiet meditation are very helpful while you are learning this skill.

#6) For Pete’s sake, Lighten up!! Stop taking yourself so seriously! Are you worried about what someone might think if you fail? Or what you might have to do if you succeed? Are you keeping your goals a secret because you thin others will laugh at you? The “rut” you’re in is safe because you’re not going anywhere. The journey to that place you’re always dreamed of is exciting and risky. What’s the worse that can happen? So what if you don’t make it? You will find adventures and learning along the way. You will grow. You will change. The road is yours. Start your journey today. You will be happy you did!